Thursday, October 7, 2010

My Rescue

I still remember the day you saved my life. It was not an unusual day, people on the outside probably didn't even notice anything at all about it. To me, however, this was the day everything changed. At this time I was forced to see a side of life that should never be looked on. My heart was nearly crushed under the weight of pain that it was too young to bear. My brain tried in vain to absorb meaning from the things I was being told, but at the same time I understood perfectly. Somewhere in the dark recesses of my mind everything was deciphered, but the other half of me refused to accept it and desperately fumbled for another explanation. I was seven going on a hundred, in one year maturing well beyond my years. I learned new concepts, one that in my innocence I never paused to consider: death, hate, divorce. I was confronted with pain beyond any measure, both physically and emotionally, with precious little time to figure out how to fight against it. An anchor had been strapped on my back and I was sinking closer and closer to the bottom, the weight of a thousand leagues crushing me, yet I could not drown. There was no release, no escape in sight from this torture, only more pressure with every league I sank.
The day my life changed all these feelings were swimming through my head. As I laid there in the soft grass, warm sunlight covering me like a blanket, you spoke to me. It was in such a soft tone I almost didn't hear, but my heart and soul leaped at the words. Simple words, not elegant and without prose, but the most powerful ones that I have ever heard uttered: I am here, do not be afraid. That day, with those words, you held out your hand to me. To accept you was like taking a huge gulp of air after holding your breath for too long underwater. There was no longer any burden on my shoulders, no more darkness clouding my vision. Yes, a long road was still ahead, and the journey would be a rough one, but with you guiding my way, holding me up with every step, what was there to fear? At seven years old you saved my life. You walked me through the shadows of death when they threatened to engulf me, infused me with such love and strength that no mortal can give- not even a mother to her child. No evil can defeat me, not even death can wrench me out of your grip. The day you gave me life and everything changed was a day like any other. No one else even considered that something earth shattering had happened. Yet this day- this perfectly ordinary day- will always be the best day of my existence.

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